As I was driving the other night, I noticed at how tired I was and how easy it would have been to go through the red lights. I had to literally slam on my breaks as the yellow light so quickly turned to red. Even though it was late in the evening, I could have easily gone through the red without no one noticing, but I was obedient to the laws and wanted to remain as safe as possible.
I love how God gives us revelations, even when we are tired. I began thinking of how God is like a traffic light. Green, yellow, red..he gives us direction in life and if we are obedient, we will remain safe, but when we stray we are taking a chance and nine times out of ten, it leads to destruction.
When God is showing you a green light in life, it is easy..traffic flows smoothly for the most part, it is safe to cruise under the light without taking no notice of anything else...but the yellow light comes on and how many of us want to speed up, instead of slow down when we see that? We don't want to wait..we think that we can press on and escape the red light...but how dangerous is that? What if the red light comes on quicker than you think and you get a ticket? Or worse yet, in an accident?
It's so similar with God's signals and direction to us...when he says "slow down" how many of us want to keep going and continue at full throttle? He says to "wait on him" many times in the word of God. Yet we try him and test him to see how far we can go. How much further can we go? How much more will he allow till he pulls us over? His rod of correction is because he loves us. He only rebukes those that he loves. We should rejoice that he protects us and draws us closer, sometimes with correction, but always with love.
How many of us want to sneak through the "red lights" when we are tired or "no one" is looking or around? But God see's all. The bible says that obedience is better than sacrifice.
so when putting the petal to the metal in life, be obedient to the direction of the spirit of God and let him lead you. Rules are put into place for our safety and so is the bible.
May he shine his light on you more and more today...
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Let Go
This is a song that I wrote today, not out of personal experience. I just felt like it may touch someone today. God bless. XO
Let Go
I used to be scared when they said…
Surrender your life to Christ.
I didn’t want to give up…
Everything I owned.
I had a life that most people would die for..
But really one person died for..
I led a life of lies and sin..
Only to be told once again..
“Give up…Lay Down…
And surrender your crown…
To the one…(to the one)…
Who gave you life
Bow Down…Let Go…
And Forget what’s behind..
Cause he paid the price for your life.”
I didn’t want to lose control..
I fought with all that I had to hold on..
to everything I had..
but now I can tell you..
I remember that day that I finally gave in..
I felt cleansed from within..
It’s the only way to live..
To take up your cross and…
Let Go
I used to be scared when they said…
Surrender your life to Christ.
I didn’t want to give up…
Everything I owned.
I had a life that most people would die for..
But really one person died for..
I led a life of lies and sin..
Only to be told once again..
“Give up…Lay Down…
And surrender your crown…
To the one…(to the one)…
Who gave you life
Bow Down…Let Go…
And Forget what’s behind..
Cause he paid the price for your life.”
I didn’t want to lose control..
I fought with all that I had to hold on..
to everything I had..
but now I can tell you..
I remember that day that I finally gave in..
I felt cleansed from within..
It’s the only way to live..
To take up your cross and…
Monday, April 20, 2009
After the Altar Call
I am so grateful to God for the salvation altar calls that are answered each and every Sunday! It blesses me so much to see people come up and accept Christ as their personal savior. Yesterday, I noticed that four men went up during our Sunday service and they weren't tiny "wimpy" looking men either. I was rejoicing over their souls...like it says that the Angels do when people choose to come to God. It makes them rejoice when another soul is added to the Kingdom of Heaven.
Then I began thinking of how at that moment of repeating the salvation prayer, your heart is beating out of your chest, it is the BEST moment of your life...from that moment on you have Christ living in you!! But then..what happens after the altar call?? That part is up to you.
Some people, and I pray that this isn't the case, may walk away from the altar and never again come back to church (to ANY church, not just mine). That breaks my heart to think that. They need to be instructed that "ok, now that you just made the decision to follow Christ, you need to attend church regularly, read your bible, pray daily, get around other believers." We do have someone tell them about these things after our altar calls. They even get a free bible. God is so good!
I just pray that they know what they just said...they asked the God of creation to live inside of them!! I pray they are ready and allow him to clean house in their heart...rid them of addictions, hurts, fear, unclean spirits, etc.
What an important prayer!!!!!!!!!
Let us be mindful that these people are BRAND NEW Christians...they need to be discipled, encouraged, motivated...
Come along side of one today...everyone has a part.
Please agree with me in this prayer:
Father, I ask in the name of Jesus that you quicken your spirit inside of your new additions to your family...I thank you Lord that they accepted you and are now granted eternal life with you. Father, I speak a mighty anointing over their lives..to follow you with all that they have, to know you and to be in your word...speak to them and draw them all closer. Send others to encourage them and help strengthen their new foundation in you. I ask this all in Jesus' name, amen.
Then I began thinking of how at that moment of repeating the salvation prayer, your heart is beating out of your chest, it is the BEST moment of your life...from that moment on you have Christ living in you!! But then..what happens after the altar call?? That part is up to you.
Some people, and I pray that this isn't the case, may walk away from the altar and never again come back to church (to ANY church, not just mine). That breaks my heart to think that. They need to be instructed that "ok, now that you just made the decision to follow Christ, you need to attend church regularly, read your bible, pray daily, get around other believers." We do have someone tell them about these things after our altar calls. They even get a free bible. God is so good!
I just pray that they know what they just said...they asked the God of creation to live inside of them!! I pray they are ready and allow him to clean house in their heart...rid them of addictions, hurts, fear, unclean spirits, etc.
What an important prayer!!!!!!!!!
Let us be mindful that these people are BRAND NEW Christians...they need to be discipled, encouraged, motivated...
Come along side of one today...everyone has a part.
Please agree with me in this prayer:
Father, I ask in the name of Jesus that you quicken your spirit inside of your new additions to your family...I thank you Lord that they accepted you and are now granted eternal life with you. Father, I speak a mighty anointing over their lives..to follow you with all that they have, to know you and to be in your word...speak to them and draw them all closer. Send others to encourage them and help strengthen their new foundation in you. I ask this all in Jesus' name, amen.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
My Testimony
Even though I grew up always believing in God, it wasn’t until three years ago that I knew the God that created me and my life changed forever.
When I was born, my mother was sixteen and my father was twenty years old. The devil tried to kill me when I was about three months old. I lived with my parents and I was neglected. I was severely dehydrated and I was going to the bathroom every minute. I had no food in my body and I had severe diarrhea. My Grandparents decided to come see me (my Grandmother said that something told her to come see me..I now know that something was the holy spirit). It was a night of a blizzard and my Grandmother was persistent on her and my Grandfather coming to see me. I praise God that they were obedient because when they took me to the hospital, the Doctors said that I could have died, if I hadn’t been brought in sooner. From that day on, I went to live with my Grandparents. I grew very close to my Grandfather and we developed a loving relationship. My Grandmother was loving too, however she showed me tough love. My Grandfather worked hard as a painter, and I would go with him to his jobs and wherever else he had to go..the bank, the grocery store, etc. I didn’t want to be apart from him..EVER. My mom and Dad would come in and out of my life, but were pretty consistent with coming around every two weeks or so. They actually split up after my brother was born. He is five years younger than me. My mother raised him as she dated many abusive men. I would occasionally go to her house to spend the night and spend time with her, but it never turned out like that. I would witness her using drugs and alcohol, being intimate with her boyfriend and being in physical fights with them too. I also witnessed the neglect that my brother was experiencing and I knew that something had to change. I told my Grandparents about how I hated going over there and how I didn’t want my little brother there anymore either. I was probably about eight at this point. Two years later, my Grandparents heard of severe abuse that my brother was undergoing and they also took him from my mother. My youngest brother was also born at this point (by a different man) and my mother later went on to have my little sister too, with yet another man. Her drug abuse was spiraling and getting worse, as was her alcohol addiction. She wasn’t happy. She came around as much as she could, to visit us. Her and my Grandmother didn’t have the healthiest relationship, they would argue constantly and my Grandmother , although loved her, would be very verbally abusive to my mother. She was also like this to me too. As I grew older, I became very aware that my Grandmother favored my brother. She would give him praise, but I always received negative comments. I know that she loved me, because she told me, but for the most part, she would put me down. I felt like I always had to “win” her love and attention. My Grandfather, on the other hand, was always very loving to me and he would defend me, but it caused a lot of arguments between him and my Grandmother and I felt guilty for that. I even grew angry at my Grandmother and would swear and yell at her often. I didn’t understand why she didn’t love me like I needed her to. I had a very poor relationship with my aunts and uncles and also my mother and father. My brother and I were very close, which I always was grateful for. We would see our other two siblings occasionally, when our mother came around. I always wanted them to come and live with us but unfortunately it didn’t work out that way. I would cry myself to sleep at night because of my mother’s habits and I would pray to God for him to keep my siblings safe. It broke my heart.
Meanwhile, my father had stopped coming around because of family differences. He would only visit us during holidays. I never understood how he could just stay away from us all year. It made me feel like I was losing him.
When I was ten years old, I witnessed my Grandmother have a stroke. She literally went back in her chair and stopped breathing. Thankfully, my Grandfather was home too and he called 911 and my family all came over too. I remember running up the stairs to my Great Grandmother (she lived upstairs from us) and crying out to God to “bring my Grandmother back”. Well, he heard my prayers because she was pronounced dead at the scene, but they brought her back with CPR. Praise God!
After that day, I tried to be nicer to my Grandmother and I spent more time with her, however I was still angry at her for being mean to me at times. I realized though that she wasn’t healthy, she spent many days in bed and she began having trouble breathing. Over the course of the next five years or so, she was in and out of the hospital. She was always very strong though and stubborn. She was very strong personality wise and physically. She was a hard worker and was always scrubbing or cleaning…she also loved to go shopping and would take good care of us by buying us what we needed for school. She also cooked very often and made sure that we were never hungry. I did and still do love my Grandmother, I am just saying that we didn’t have the best relationship. My Grandmother passed away from heart failure in May 1998. I had lost what I knew as a mother and wasn’t ready for it at all. It made me mature a lot and it also brought a lot of guilt because we argued the night beforehand. I never got to apologize for being so mean to her all those years. I was angry. It took me over ten years to get over that and it wasn’t until I found Christ could I forgive not only her, but myself for all of the anger in our relationship. Then there was my relationship with my mother: I remember riding the school bus home and wondering if she would be on the couch when I got there…”would this be a week where she came to visit?” I missed her, and always desired more of her time and wanted to know her, but I never really did. I remember as my siblings and I got older, she began to start using heavier drugs and she would flee to Schenectady often on a drug binge. She had met more abusive guys and eventually it would destroy her.
In May 1999, my mother went disappearing. Even when she was in jail, she would write to us and let us know that she loved us and she was ok, but we knew after not hearing from her for at least a year that something was much different this time. We still have not heard from her to this day. We put out missing people reports and have even written to television shows to try to find her, but no prevail.
My father had come to my Grandmother’s services, but then we hadn’t seen him again in several years. We knew he was in the area, but for some reason he didn’t seem to want to see us. I didn’t understand. (We have since reconciled our relationship), but back then with losing my Grandmother, mother and my father again and my brother also moved away to college…it made me depressed and I did poorly on my college grades for the first two years. I began dating a guy who was extremely verbally and emotionally abusive to me. We moved in together quickly and he was into evil music and movies. I also became interested in some bad things. I became sexually active with him and eventually felt abused in that also. I didn’t know how to receive love, because the only person who had shown me pure love was my Grandfather. I was only living upstairs from him, but I even became distant to him due to my boyfriend at the time. I became more interested in my abusive boyfriend than I did for anyone else in my life. I lost all of my friends. He was very possessive. I was heading in a bad direction and was pretty much already there. I had a few people witness to me about Christ, but I told them that I already believe in God and I was “good.”
I thought about suicide a few times but never actually tried it. There were many nights where I still felt guilt from my Grandmother and I cried myself to sleep, wishing I could have changed the past. The condemnation I felt was unbearable at times. I didn’t have any friends and the only person that I hung out with was my abusive boyfriend. I began to be more depressed. I was thin, but I thought I was fat. That was because of the mental abuse that he fed me. Unfortunately I believed every lie he told me. This went on for almost four years. Eventually he got a job in the south (Virginia), and he went away for training in Georgia for the Summer. I felt so free for the first time in years. I moved back downstairs with my Grandfather and having family around and not hearing constant lies was so nice. However, in the fall, I moved to Virginia to live with him. I wasn’t happy leaving my family and my Dog, but I did it because I thought I loved him. After I was there for a few weeks, I noticed that he wasn’t good for me. I was being abused day and night by him and I cried often. I missed my Grandfather so much. My cousin Stephanie was praying for me and I remember one day I went to work and a girl I work with noticed I was crying. She asked if she could pray with me. I remember that I felt so different after she prayed and I thanked her. After another month or so, I had made up my mind. I was going back home and leaving him for good. It wasn’t an easy break up, but it was one of the most important decisions I ever made. I moved back home in Nov. 2003. I am so grateful for a Grandfather that never let me go. For a God who never let me go either. PRAISE HIM!!
I would love to say that I got saved after moving home but it took two more hurtful relationships with men, one who cheated on me and another who rejected me, to realize that Christ is what I wanted and needed.
In the summer of 2005 (here is my FAV part of my story or I should say LIFE), I helped my cousin and her husband plan their wedding. They were both attending a bible school at the time and were on FIRE for God!! I couldn’t escape the Gospel when I was with them. GLORY! They both witnessed to me in more ways than words and I felt the love of God for the first time in my life. They invited me to church and one day I accepted. I gave my life to the Lord in Late Nov. 2005. I began attending church with them and my cousin Stephanie discipled me with the bible and taught me how to receive God’s love.
I started attending church regularly in February 2006 and made a bunch of new Christian friends who showed me what being a true friend really means. I have lost some along the way, and made more, but there are some who are still faithful and by my side. I praise God for a church with a leadership that doesn’t compromise! We have vision, fire and are willing to go above and beyond to see the Kingdom of God come to Earth. I have since lost my wonderful, dear Grandfather (in Nov. 2007) but I walked him through the salvation prayer and today he resides with Jesus in Heaven!!!!!! GLORY!!
God has been so wonderful and faithful to me and I could go on and on about the healing that he has brought to my past. I am forever grateful and a new woman because of his unfailing love for me and innocent blood that was shed for my sins!!! HALLELUJAH!!
When I was born, my mother was sixteen and my father was twenty years old. The devil tried to kill me when I was about three months old. I lived with my parents and I was neglected. I was severely dehydrated and I was going to the bathroom every minute. I had no food in my body and I had severe diarrhea. My Grandparents decided to come see me (my Grandmother said that something told her to come see me..I now know that something was the holy spirit). It was a night of a blizzard and my Grandmother was persistent on her and my Grandfather coming to see me. I praise God that they were obedient because when they took me to the hospital, the Doctors said that I could have died, if I hadn’t been brought in sooner. From that day on, I went to live with my Grandparents. I grew very close to my Grandfather and we developed a loving relationship. My Grandmother was loving too, however she showed me tough love. My Grandfather worked hard as a painter, and I would go with him to his jobs and wherever else he had to go..the bank, the grocery store, etc. I didn’t want to be apart from him..EVER. My mom and Dad would come in and out of my life, but were pretty consistent with coming around every two weeks or so. They actually split up after my brother was born. He is five years younger than me. My mother raised him as she dated many abusive men. I would occasionally go to her house to spend the night and spend time with her, but it never turned out like that. I would witness her using drugs and alcohol, being intimate with her boyfriend and being in physical fights with them too. I also witnessed the neglect that my brother was experiencing and I knew that something had to change. I told my Grandparents about how I hated going over there and how I didn’t want my little brother there anymore either. I was probably about eight at this point. Two years later, my Grandparents heard of severe abuse that my brother was undergoing and they also took him from my mother. My youngest brother was also born at this point (by a different man) and my mother later went on to have my little sister too, with yet another man. Her drug abuse was spiraling and getting worse, as was her alcohol addiction. She wasn’t happy. She came around as much as she could, to visit us. Her and my Grandmother didn’t have the healthiest relationship, they would argue constantly and my Grandmother , although loved her, would be very verbally abusive to my mother. She was also like this to me too. As I grew older, I became very aware that my Grandmother favored my brother. She would give him praise, but I always received negative comments. I know that she loved me, because she told me, but for the most part, she would put me down. I felt like I always had to “win” her love and attention. My Grandfather, on the other hand, was always very loving to me and he would defend me, but it caused a lot of arguments between him and my Grandmother and I felt guilty for that. I even grew angry at my Grandmother and would swear and yell at her often. I didn’t understand why she didn’t love me like I needed her to. I had a very poor relationship with my aunts and uncles and also my mother and father. My brother and I were very close, which I always was grateful for. We would see our other two siblings occasionally, when our mother came around. I always wanted them to come and live with us but unfortunately it didn’t work out that way. I would cry myself to sleep at night because of my mother’s habits and I would pray to God for him to keep my siblings safe. It broke my heart.
Meanwhile, my father had stopped coming around because of family differences. He would only visit us during holidays. I never understood how he could just stay away from us all year. It made me feel like I was losing him.
When I was ten years old, I witnessed my Grandmother have a stroke. She literally went back in her chair and stopped breathing. Thankfully, my Grandfather was home too and he called 911 and my family all came over too. I remember running up the stairs to my Great Grandmother (she lived upstairs from us) and crying out to God to “bring my Grandmother back”. Well, he heard my prayers because she was pronounced dead at the scene, but they brought her back with CPR. Praise God!
After that day, I tried to be nicer to my Grandmother and I spent more time with her, however I was still angry at her for being mean to me at times. I realized though that she wasn’t healthy, she spent many days in bed and she began having trouble breathing. Over the course of the next five years or so, she was in and out of the hospital. She was always very strong though and stubborn. She was very strong personality wise and physically. She was a hard worker and was always scrubbing or cleaning…she also loved to go shopping and would take good care of us by buying us what we needed for school. She also cooked very often and made sure that we were never hungry. I did and still do love my Grandmother, I am just saying that we didn’t have the best relationship. My Grandmother passed away from heart failure in May 1998. I had lost what I knew as a mother and wasn’t ready for it at all. It made me mature a lot and it also brought a lot of guilt because we argued the night beforehand. I never got to apologize for being so mean to her all those years. I was angry. It took me over ten years to get over that and it wasn’t until I found Christ could I forgive not only her, but myself for all of the anger in our relationship. Then there was my relationship with my mother: I remember riding the school bus home and wondering if she would be on the couch when I got there…”would this be a week where she came to visit?” I missed her, and always desired more of her time and wanted to know her, but I never really did. I remember as my siblings and I got older, she began to start using heavier drugs and she would flee to Schenectady often on a drug binge. She had met more abusive guys and eventually it would destroy her.
In May 1999, my mother went disappearing. Even when she was in jail, she would write to us and let us know that she loved us and she was ok, but we knew after not hearing from her for at least a year that something was much different this time. We still have not heard from her to this day. We put out missing people reports and have even written to television shows to try to find her, but no prevail.
My father had come to my Grandmother’s services, but then we hadn’t seen him again in several years. We knew he was in the area, but for some reason he didn’t seem to want to see us. I didn’t understand. (We have since reconciled our relationship), but back then with losing my Grandmother, mother and my father again and my brother also moved away to college…it made me depressed and I did poorly on my college grades for the first two years. I began dating a guy who was extremely verbally and emotionally abusive to me. We moved in together quickly and he was into evil music and movies. I also became interested in some bad things. I became sexually active with him and eventually felt abused in that also. I didn’t know how to receive love, because the only person who had shown me pure love was my Grandfather. I was only living upstairs from him, but I even became distant to him due to my boyfriend at the time. I became more interested in my abusive boyfriend than I did for anyone else in my life. I lost all of my friends. He was very possessive. I was heading in a bad direction and was pretty much already there. I had a few people witness to me about Christ, but I told them that I already believe in God and I was “good.”
I thought about suicide a few times but never actually tried it. There were many nights where I still felt guilt from my Grandmother and I cried myself to sleep, wishing I could have changed the past. The condemnation I felt was unbearable at times. I didn’t have any friends and the only person that I hung out with was my abusive boyfriend. I began to be more depressed. I was thin, but I thought I was fat. That was because of the mental abuse that he fed me. Unfortunately I believed every lie he told me. This went on for almost four years. Eventually he got a job in the south (Virginia), and he went away for training in Georgia for the Summer. I felt so free for the first time in years. I moved back downstairs with my Grandfather and having family around and not hearing constant lies was so nice. However, in the fall, I moved to Virginia to live with him. I wasn’t happy leaving my family and my Dog, but I did it because I thought I loved him. After I was there for a few weeks, I noticed that he wasn’t good for me. I was being abused day and night by him and I cried often. I missed my Grandfather so much. My cousin Stephanie was praying for me and I remember one day I went to work and a girl I work with noticed I was crying. She asked if she could pray with me. I remember that I felt so different after she prayed and I thanked her. After another month or so, I had made up my mind. I was going back home and leaving him for good. It wasn’t an easy break up, but it was one of the most important decisions I ever made. I moved back home in Nov. 2003. I am so grateful for a Grandfather that never let me go. For a God who never let me go either. PRAISE HIM!!
I would love to say that I got saved after moving home but it took two more hurtful relationships with men, one who cheated on me and another who rejected me, to realize that Christ is what I wanted and needed.
In the summer of 2005 (here is my FAV part of my story or I should say LIFE), I helped my cousin and her husband plan their wedding. They were both attending a bible school at the time and were on FIRE for God!! I couldn’t escape the Gospel when I was with them. GLORY! They both witnessed to me in more ways than words and I felt the love of God for the first time in my life. They invited me to church and one day I accepted. I gave my life to the Lord in Late Nov. 2005. I began attending church with them and my cousin Stephanie discipled me with the bible and taught me how to receive God’s love.
I started attending church regularly in February 2006 and made a bunch of new Christian friends who showed me what being a true friend really means. I have lost some along the way, and made more, but there are some who are still faithful and by my side. I praise God for a church with a leadership that doesn’t compromise! We have vision, fire and are willing to go above and beyond to see the Kingdom of God come to Earth. I have since lost my wonderful, dear Grandfather (in Nov. 2007) but I walked him through the salvation prayer and today he resides with Jesus in Heaven!!!!!! GLORY!!
God has been so wonderful and faithful to me and I could go on and on about the healing that he has brought to my past. I am forever grateful and a new woman because of his unfailing love for me and innocent blood that was shed for my sins!!! HALLELUJAH!!
Monday, April 13, 2009
Heart
I am sure that everyone reading this has experienced a heart break or discouragement at some point in their life. The possibility that you are facing a challenge right now in the area of your heart is very large, considering we are very passionate individuals. God created us to be passionate. His word even says that he rather us be hot or cold than luke warm. Let us boil! I pray that this blog will shed some light onto something that you may be dealing with.
This is more of a personal blog than a word of exhortation, but I do pray that it helps you all. I was writing to my friend Tara this morning and the discussion of guarding our hearts came up. This is something that we kind of laugh about and say, “ok, how in the world are we supposed to guard our hearts?” Both of us have dealt with some big rejection issues in our lives. There are many days where we will email back and forth, just venting about something going on in our life and yet we always come to the resolution that God is in control. We know this, yet we always have to say it. Sometimes I feel like a broken record when I tell her, “Tara, God has it all in control. Let his timing and will be done.”
She also tells me things like, “Deb, God is able to do anything.”
Amen and Amen to all of these things, but sometimes, can we be real and say that it’s just not always easy?
I was driving my car around the other day and just thinking…I was amazed at how easily I seem to be able to give my heart away to people and things, even though it has been so misused, abandoned, hurt, confused, broken, neglected, trampled on, destroyed and tainted in the past. I was shocked at how easily I can just hand it off to the next person that comes into my life or the next thing that I become passionate about, without really asking God what he thinks first. I am working on this. I do go to God before anyone or anything for the most part, but let it be a priority to go to him, the creator of my heart, before giving it to anyone else.
Tara and others tell me, “Hello, we are human! We are going to fall for guys, we are going to get our hearts broken, we are going to do too much sometimes, but it’s ok cause God will work it out”, I tend to forget sometimes that it is ok to take chances. I am so quick to give my heart away, but when it returns to me broken and marred, I get so angry that I gave it away in the first place. Then I think to myself, “I will never give it away again.” I try to build walls and God says “Don’t do that!” and with ONE word of love from him, he knocks down the first layer of the wall that I was trying to build. Praise God for that! I praise him for the ability to love and let go. For the ability to be healed and cleansed by his blood.
While writing Tara today, I had a revelation. Say you have a precious item (let’s say a gold necklace that was passed down from generations and the significance of the necklace was great), one day someone that you really care about see’s the necklace and likes it and you want to let them borrow it. You give it to them with all that you have…you TRUST them to take good care of it. After all, you have spent many nights wearing this necklace and it holds dear value to you. You find out that the person who borrowed it has now misplaced it (NEGLECT). They have no idea where it is and they have no desire to find it for you. You are saddened because it means a lot to you and how could they want it so bad, but now have no motivation to find it again?
They eventually find it, but it is now all twisted (CONFUSED) and it doesn’t look as nice as it used to. You are upset with them and they apologize but don’t seem too hurt by it. They offer it back and you thank them, all the while holding your tongue cause you are so hurt by what they did. You know you must forgive them though. So you do..and eventually someone else comes along that wants to borrow it…by now you have already taken it to the jeweler and it is looking brand new again…you have already forgotten how sad you were the last time, cause the jeweler has done such a good job on it, so you give it to this person to “borrow.” This time, the person not only gets it all dirty (SIN), but has also broken pieces of it and some links are missing. You take it back and this time it costs more money to get it fixed…it takes a lot longer too. You keep doing this process because, well you are a giving person and it is how you are supposed to be. BUT, what about waiting for the person that you marry? What about waiting for the person that lives with you and you will be able to keep watch over it and share it together. What about asking God before you give it away so easily?
I’m not talking about a necklace, I am talking about your heart. Your heart is a sensitive, delicate part of who God made you to be. It is Jesus’ home. You can not live without it. Be careful who you let in and who you give it to…
Does anyone have any advice on guarding your heart or any input they would like to add? I am always open to comments, suggestions, questions.
God bless you!
This is more of a personal blog than a word of exhortation, but I do pray that it helps you all. I was writing to my friend Tara this morning and the discussion of guarding our hearts came up. This is something that we kind of laugh about and say, “ok, how in the world are we supposed to guard our hearts?” Both of us have dealt with some big rejection issues in our lives. There are many days where we will email back and forth, just venting about something going on in our life and yet we always come to the resolution that God is in control. We know this, yet we always have to say it. Sometimes I feel like a broken record when I tell her, “Tara, God has it all in control. Let his timing and will be done.”
She also tells me things like, “Deb, God is able to do anything.”
Amen and Amen to all of these things, but sometimes, can we be real and say that it’s just not always easy?
I was driving my car around the other day and just thinking…I was amazed at how easily I seem to be able to give my heart away to people and things, even though it has been so misused, abandoned, hurt, confused, broken, neglected, trampled on, destroyed and tainted in the past. I was shocked at how easily I can just hand it off to the next person that comes into my life or the next thing that I become passionate about, without really asking God what he thinks first. I am working on this. I do go to God before anyone or anything for the most part, but let it be a priority to go to him, the creator of my heart, before giving it to anyone else.
Tara and others tell me, “Hello, we are human! We are going to fall for guys, we are going to get our hearts broken, we are going to do too much sometimes, but it’s ok cause God will work it out”, I tend to forget sometimes that it is ok to take chances. I am so quick to give my heart away, but when it returns to me broken and marred, I get so angry that I gave it away in the first place. Then I think to myself, “I will never give it away again.” I try to build walls and God says “Don’t do that!” and with ONE word of love from him, he knocks down the first layer of the wall that I was trying to build. Praise God for that! I praise him for the ability to love and let go. For the ability to be healed and cleansed by his blood.
While writing Tara today, I had a revelation. Say you have a precious item (let’s say a gold necklace that was passed down from generations and the significance of the necklace was great), one day someone that you really care about see’s the necklace and likes it and you want to let them borrow it. You give it to them with all that you have…you TRUST them to take good care of it. After all, you have spent many nights wearing this necklace and it holds dear value to you. You find out that the person who borrowed it has now misplaced it (NEGLECT). They have no idea where it is and they have no desire to find it for you. You are saddened because it means a lot to you and how could they want it so bad, but now have no motivation to find it again?
They eventually find it, but it is now all twisted (CONFUSED) and it doesn’t look as nice as it used to. You are upset with them and they apologize but don’t seem too hurt by it. They offer it back and you thank them, all the while holding your tongue cause you are so hurt by what they did. You know you must forgive them though. So you do..and eventually someone else comes along that wants to borrow it…by now you have already taken it to the jeweler and it is looking brand new again…you have already forgotten how sad you were the last time, cause the jeweler has done such a good job on it, so you give it to this person to “borrow.” This time, the person not only gets it all dirty (SIN), but has also broken pieces of it and some links are missing. You take it back and this time it costs more money to get it fixed…it takes a lot longer too. You keep doing this process because, well you are a giving person and it is how you are supposed to be. BUT, what about waiting for the person that you marry? What about waiting for the person that lives with you and you will be able to keep watch over it and share it together. What about asking God before you give it away so easily?
I’m not talking about a necklace, I am talking about your heart. Your heart is a sensitive, delicate part of who God made you to be. It is Jesus’ home. You can not live without it. Be careful who you let in and who you give it to…
Does anyone have any advice on guarding your heart or any input they would like to add? I am always open to comments, suggestions, questions.
God bless you!
Friday, April 10, 2009
Out of Religious Duty
We all know that it is Easter week. Whether you celebrate it or not.
Now before I begin, let me just say that this blog may offend people….I cannot apologize for that because I feel that it is what God is leading me to write. Many people in the bible offended people with words of truth…but, I just pray that this encourages you instead.
I was eating lunch out yesterday and I overheard the man and woman at the table next to me talking about Easter. I wasn’t trying to be nosy, we were just sitting very close to each other. The man said something along the lines of going to church on Sunday. Now I am not judging from what they were saying, because I don’t know their walk with the Lord at all and neither is it my place to, but I began thinking, “I wonder if they are only going to church on Sunday because it is Easter?”
I began thinking about before I was saved. I grew up Catholic, yet not a very faithful one. I would attend church on the “holidays” and maybe twice all year. It was my religious duty as a Catholic. It was what I was “supposed to do” right? I mean, if I didn’t go to church to honor God on Easter than I was going to hell, right? If I didn’t go on Palm Sunday, it was a sin…wasn’t it?
The answer to these questions is no. No where in the bible does God say, “you must go to church on Palm Sunday AND Easter, or that’s it for you.” But yet the world thinks that they owe God something for not going all of the other days a year. “Hey, if I go on the holidays, like Christmas Eve mass and Easter, I’m good. I fulfilled my religious duty.” Wow..so not true.
First of all, Jesus was not religious. He actually spoke to the Pharisee’s (religious leaders) and showed them that he is the way, truth and life, not religion. We are to follow the holy spirit and let him guide us, not a bunch of man-made rules. I am not putting down Catholics, I am merely stating that I was one, so I know from personal experiences how some things happen. There are many Catholics who are filled with the holy ghost and love God…so please don’t think that I am pointing any fingers here. There are many other denominations that also fall into the “Easter Sunday” regimen.
It just breaks my heart because Jesus desires a relationship with us. If these people are only going to church on holidays then they need to ask themselves why?? God’s word says to be rooted and planted in the house of the Lord. That means to be steady in church, to be learning and growing with other believers.
It leads me to think that they obviously must BELIEVE in God to even be attending church on those days, but the bible says that even the demons believe and TREMBLE!
Wow..even demons believe in God. That’s saying a lot right there. There are many people who don’t believe in God..that’s sad because he is coming back in power and glory! I would not want to be left behind. There is a scripture that talks about people talking to God when they stand before him and he says, “I knew you not.” They are like, “but God, we taught in your streets, we ate with you and cast out demons in your name…” and he will say, “away from me, I never knew you.”
What he is talking about here is that he didn’t have a relationship with them. That’s what it is all about. It is about KNOWING him…not just attending church and then leaving and not coming back until the next holiday. It isn’t about even going to church every single service and leaving the building and not talking to him again or praying until you step foot in the building again. SEE, IT ISN’T ABOUT A BUILDING!!! It is about the Kingdom of God living and dwelling in YOU! It is about a right relationship with the Father. He desires you to know him more…he wants to speak to you and show you mighty things that you do not know. Ask of him!! He wants you to ask and receive.
Picture this, picture a husband and wife- they have a relationship, right? Well, possibly by status only, because if they are not communicating and being intimate with each other, than what kind of relationship do they have??
What if the husband said, “Dear, we can only talk or commune when we are in this house and that’s it, ok?” The wife agrees and when they leave their house they have no communication whatsoever. They don’t know each other outside of that house. Kind of like some people that go to church. They do not know God outside of the BUILDING. BUT PEOPLE OF GOD, WE ARE THE CHURCH!!! Our body is the temple of the holy spirit. We are to keep it pure and holy. We are to treat it like we would treat the actual church building. Keep it clean and in good condition…don’t allow anything that would harm it to enter. Keep good watch over it.
We are the body of Christ.
I wish you and all of yours, a very Happy Easter. Let us remember that he suffered for our sins and he rose for his glory that one day we will partake in!! ALL BECAUSE HE LOVES US AND WE LOVE HIM!
There is so much more, children of God..get into the inner courts!! Dance with Jesus…sit and eat with him…know him…know his heart for you…listen to him…
It will change your life…..it changed mine. <3
Now before I begin, let me just say that this blog may offend people….I cannot apologize for that because I feel that it is what God is leading me to write. Many people in the bible offended people with words of truth…but, I just pray that this encourages you instead.
I was eating lunch out yesterday and I overheard the man and woman at the table next to me talking about Easter. I wasn’t trying to be nosy, we were just sitting very close to each other. The man said something along the lines of going to church on Sunday. Now I am not judging from what they were saying, because I don’t know their walk with the Lord at all and neither is it my place to, but I began thinking, “I wonder if they are only going to church on Sunday because it is Easter?”
I began thinking about before I was saved. I grew up Catholic, yet not a very faithful one. I would attend church on the “holidays” and maybe twice all year. It was my religious duty as a Catholic. It was what I was “supposed to do” right? I mean, if I didn’t go to church to honor God on Easter than I was going to hell, right? If I didn’t go on Palm Sunday, it was a sin…wasn’t it?
The answer to these questions is no. No where in the bible does God say, “you must go to church on Palm Sunday AND Easter, or that’s it for you.” But yet the world thinks that they owe God something for not going all of the other days a year. “Hey, if I go on the holidays, like Christmas Eve mass and Easter, I’m good. I fulfilled my religious duty.” Wow..so not true.
First of all, Jesus was not religious. He actually spoke to the Pharisee’s (religious leaders) and showed them that he is the way, truth and life, not religion. We are to follow the holy spirit and let him guide us, not a bunch of man-made rules. I am not putting down Catholics, I am merely stating that I was one, so I know from personal experiences how some things happen. There are many Catholics who are filled with the holy ghost and love God…so please don’t think that I am pointing any fingers here. There are many other denominations that also fall into the “Easter Sunday” regimen.
It just breaks my heart because Jesus desires a relationship with us. If these people are only going to church on holidays then they need to ask themselves why?? God’s word says to be rooted and planted in the house of the Lord. That means to be steady in church, to be learning and growing with other believers.
It leads me to think that they obviously must BELIEVE in God to even be attending church on those days, but the bible says that even the demons believe and TREMBLE!
Wow..even demons believe in God. That’s saying a lot right there. There are many people who don’t believe in God..that’s sad because he is coming back in power and glory! I would not want to be left behind. There is a scripture that talks about people talking to God when they stand before him and he says, “I knew you not.” They are like, “but God, we taught in your streets, we ate with you and cast out demons in your name…” and he will say, “away from me, I never knew you.”
What he is talking about here is that he didn’t have a relationship with them. That’s what it is all about. It is about KNOWING him…not just attending church and then leaving and not coming back until the next holiday. It isn’t about even going to church every single service and leaving the building and not talking to him again or praying until you step foot in the building again. SEE, IT ISN’T ABOUT A BUILDING!!! It is about the Kingdom of God living and dwelling in YOU! It is about a right relationship with the Father. He desires you to know him more…he wants to speak to you and show you mighty things that you do not know. Ask of him!! He wants you to ask and receive.
Picture this, picture a husband and wife- they have a relationship, right? Well, possibly by status only, because if they are not communicating and being intimate with each other, than what kind of relationship do they have??
What if the husband said, “Dear, we can only talk or commune when we are in this house and that’s it, ok?” The wife agrees and when they leave their house they have no communication whatsoever. They don’t know each other outside of that house. Kind of like some people that go to church. They do not know God outside of the BUILDING. BUT PEOPLE OF GOD, WE ARE THE CHURCH!!! Our body is the temple of the holy spirit. We are to keep it pure and holy. We are to treat it like we would treat the actual church building. Keep it clean and in good condition…don’t allow anything that would harm it to enter. Keep good watch over it.
We are the body of Christ.
I wish you and all of yours, a very Happy Easter. Let us remember that he suffered for our sins and he rose for his glory that one day we will partake in!! ALL BECAUSE HE LOVES US AND WE LOVE HIM!
There is so much more, children of God..get into the inner courts!! Dance with Jesus…sit and eat with him…know him…know his heart for you…listen to him…
It will change your life…..it changed mine. <3
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Song of Solomon 7:10-12
Song of Solomon 7:10-12
“I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me. Come, my beloved, let us go forth into the field; let us lodge in the villages. Let us get up early to the vineyards; let us see if the vine flourish, whether the tender grape appear, and the pomegranates bud forth: there will I give thee my loves.”
While reading Song of Solomon, I am reminded of God’s love and beauty. Song of Solomon is a beautiful description of intimacy with Jesus. In the verses 7:10-12, I envision a beautiful countryside, one of ripe fruit and plenty of greenery all around. I can even smell the fresh, country air and feel the breeze on my face as Jesus tells us in verses 11 and 12, “let us go forth into the field and let us see if the vine flourish…there I will give you my love.” (paraphrased).
We all desire romance. God created us to be passionate, loving individuals. He created us to desire him and to spend time with him and love him. He desires US…Verse 10 says, “his desire is toward me.”
Take a moment and picture this: You live in a place like something out of Beauty and the Beast…maybe Italy or Greece…you lodge in the villages with Jesus…with the lover of your soul. Many people think of Europe to be romantic...that's why I used Italy or Greece. The fresh fruit stands in the sunny streets, the quartet playing on the corner...imagine the sun shining on your face. And the best part of it all is, that Jesus is WITH YOU. He is romancing you...he is wooing you and he will never hurt you. You can trust him with all that you have and are..
His love is beautiful and amazing...imagine him holding you, as you overlook the vineyard with him. Allow him to show you the delicate beauty that awaits you, as you trust him to hold your heart.
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