Called to Love

We are called to love. To love unconditionally for that matter. How can some people love if they don't first love themselves? Scripture says to "love your neighbor as yourself." If you don't even love yourself, let along LIKE yourself, then how can you possibly love someone else? We need to be transformed from the inside out. We need to be washed in the blood of Christ and our minds need to be renewed. The battle is always in the mind. I heard it once said that actions are always brought forth by thoughts. When reading the bible, our mind is transformed by the holy spirit. The words become life to us and we look at things differently. The more time we spend with God, the more we begin to love ourselves, because he FIRST loved us. God loves us unconditionally. It is by HIM and HIM alone that we are renewed and cleansed. It is by the blood that was shed from his son, Jesus, that died on Calvary and rose again, that we are FORGIVEN and offered hope and a future! We are set free and redeemed!! Nothing that we do can attain this great and wonderful salvation. No words, actions or thoughts can gain anything that the Lord has for us. It is written that "by Grace we have been saved." God offered us his grace when he sent Jesus to die for us. He was born to die. FOR YOU. When we offer our hearts to God in true devotion, that is when we are set free. It is by loving him that we can love others. We are made in his likeness, in his image…Hallelujah!! God has RISEN. He is alive and lives in us! God wants us to sit at his feet…to have sweet fellowship with him…to just BE, not always DO. He told me recently, "Debbie, before you can be a wife, before you can be a Pastor, before any of these things, you must first just be my daughter." We need to come into the realization that he is HOLY and loves us beyond our comprehension. We need to understand that his ways are higher than ours. His thoughts are not our thoughts. Ask him today to fill you with his love…to just soak you in his tender mercy…to speak to you so clearly and to cleanse you from all unrighteousness. He is faithful to do exceedingly and abundantly all that we can ask or imagine. Find it in your heart to love…first him, then yourself, and ultimately others. In doing this, you will flow in the plans that he has for you. The bible says that God is love. A recent preacher just preached a sermon last weekend that said "Satan cannot imitate love." That was powerful. When we love, we are representing God himself in our lives. God is love. Let us pray that we must decrease so that Christ can increase in us. Not 20% us and 80% God, but let him have ALL of you…100% Jesus Christ living and reigning in YOU. It's time my people, says the spirit of the Lord, to abandon all that you once knew as love. Redeem the time, for it is short. Let my words be your words and my actions be your actions. Follow me and I will make you a leader. Let my holy spirit have its way within you. Stop looking at the things around you. Come to me and repent, for the kingdom of heaven is surely at hand this day. Do not look to men but instead look to me…your loving Father. My mercy surely abounds and on judgment day, you will not be condemned. Sit with me, I desire to minister to you. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks and so you too will speak with conviction when you spend the time with me. I love you my precious sons and daughters. Flow through me.

Thank you Jesus.

Apartment Hunting Testimony!

This was my testimony for my apartment...written back in July.

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am SO grateful that God intervenes in my life. : ) He has ONCE AGAIN gone above and beyond and has met an urgent need of mine.

As most of you know, I have been apartment hunting and praying that God would provide something affordable and safe for my Dog and I to live. After a few weeks of really being tested…and ALMOST taking two apartments that I really wasn't too happy with (would have totally been settling)…God has provided the PERFECT place for me to live.

I gave this testimony in church last night, but isn't it awesome when we fully rely on God to provide and listen to his voice? He didn't ALLOW me to take the other two apartments and proved that by closing the doors QUICKLY. The first apt in Troy, I was trying to find the people to tell them that I would take it and I couldn't find them anywhere…don't you know the guy comes in like 10 min later and BEFORE I could say I'll take it, he said it was just rented out. WOW. What a blessing!! Sara and Adam came with me…thanks for your support and honest comments guys. : ) I should have listened, but thankfully God closed it anyways.

The next place I was about to take was in Albany by Lark Street and smelled like pot/cigarettes and had a possibility of having bugs. YUCK. I was willing to take it though cause it was so close to everything, figuring I could clean it up real good. Again- settling. Well God closed that door real quick too in different ways.

The gas is costing me an ARM and a LEG to go to Amsterdam, so God knew I needed something fast. I prayed while driving down Western Ave last week and said to God, "God, I really would love to live in this area…its clean, safe and SO close to work and 10 min from Church, family and friends…if its your will, I know you will provide something here."

Well I had NO CLUE that my friend Justin's place would soon be available to rent. (which is exactly in my price range, not to mention off of WESTERN AVE, next to Suny (work) and 10 min from Church!!!!...*clears throat* can we say WOW??!?)

I was told that if someone else didn't take the apt (the landlord had already asked another woman first), then it was mine if I wanted it!!!

I found out LAST NIGHT that the woman declined and it was offered to me and I accepted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! : )

I am SOOOOO happy! GOD, THANK YOU AGAIN and thank you for all of your prayers, my dear friends and family. I love you all.

Debbie

He Knocks

I have been re-reading alot of blogs that I wrote a few months ago and they have all been speaking to me so much today. I am posting them on here in hopes of encouraging someone in the word of the Lord. Be encouraged my friends! Love you~

God has been speaking to me about doors opening and closing. He had me read something the other day in Revelation…how John saw a door leading to the throne room and God said to come up into it. He opens doors, but WE need to walk into them.

The other night at home…I was half asleep and heard knocking from my pillow…REALLY loud…it woke me up all the way. It was like I had my head next to a door and someone was knocking. The scripture came to me the next day, "behold, I stand at the door and knock…if anyone hears let him let me in.." (paraphrased.) I told God that I allowed him in already…but have I let him into my deepest parts of my heart? WOW.

In Revelation, John writes that there was a door standing open in heaven and the voice of the Lord said for him to come up into it. How often do we see open doors before us, set by the Lord, and dont move or do anything about it!! God DOES open doors, but we need to WALK through them ourselves. It is our choice. He gives us choices!

Revelation 4

The Throne in Heaven

1After this I looked, and there before me was a door standing open in heaven. And the voice I had first heard speaking to me like a trumpet said, "Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this."

When I first heard the knocking (from my pillow) not from the other ear which was facing up (the one that was uncovered from my pillow)...I was a little scared, but again..I was half asleep so I just went back to sleep. I pondered this the next day, on my way into work. The scripture below came to mind:

Revelation 3:20

20Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.

He is always knocking. He doesnt give up on us...EVER. Can you hear him knocking and calling to you...saying "lover, wake up! Am I in your heart? Can you hear my voice? Will you let me go deeper?"

When I was looking up the scriptures for this, I came across this one also:

Song of Solomon 5:2

beloved

2 I slept but my heart was awake.
Listen! My lover is knocking:
"Open to me, my sister, my darling,
my dove, my flawless one.
My head is drenched with dew,
my hair with the dampness of the night."

WOW...is that totally God or what? Praise Jesus!
He is always asking us to come in...deeper...into our INNER courts. The bible says to draw close to God and he will draw close to us. Amen.

Detours

Wrote on 06/16/08


Detours are a pain the neck...all you want to do is get to your destination and 9 times out of 10 are in a rush. Detours add another 5, sometimes 20 minutes to your trip.

I was driving today on my lunch break and came across a detour. It was a relatively short one, but I somehow became annoyed. I took a deep breath and just as he always does when I am wondering why I am so upset about something so minscule...he gave me a revelation. Praise you God.

Sometimes there are things or places in our life that we want to be or to have...like NOW. "What do you mean WAIT?!?!?!" Why wait? And sometimes, just like detours, God has another way for us.

Just like Detours, God brings us a different way and many times it takes LONGER to get what we wanted. BUT how many of you know that God is a FAITHFUL, LOVING and PROTECTING God?

Who knows why the detours are there....sometimes road work is the cause...pot holes being fixed...bridges repaired, sidewalks being placed..etc...but other times it could be because of an accident, or maybe flooding on the roads or fire....sometimes it can be DANGEROUS....the road that we WANT to go on can be dangerous, but just like detours, our faithful Father protects us and leads us by the hand into the way everlasting.

God, I thank you for all of the times that you didnt give me what I wanted at the time...because you saw down "the road" and didnt like what you saw for me, had I continued on that path. Thank you for providing "detours" in my life and for eventually allowing me to see that the detour all along provided a safer alternative.

I praise you and I love you Father...amen.

Summer thoughts

This was a blog that I wrote in July of this past Summer. I can't believe how I felt while writing this because our God is SOO good and has delivered me from these feelings and has healed my heart since writing this. I am sharing because I feel like it may encourage someone today. God can do anything...with him all things are possible. At the time that I wrote this, I was feeling very low...very confused and hurt. He has really transformed me in the last 3 months. Hallelujah!

But remember, "without the rain and the pain there can be no growth."

Wow…this Summer has been going by so fast and through it all..so have my emotions. I am tired of moving. Since Grandpa died, 8 months ago, I have been on the go ever since. Between packing and unpacking THREE different apartments, moving not only my things, but also my heart..my dog…my life. Trying to be settled only to be uprooted again and again….not finding any peace or comfort in anything…

Don't get me wrong, I liked the places that I lived and believed I was there for a season..but it was hard. I had only moved once in my whole life and I just moved three times in less than a year. The post office got annoyed with me…changing my address yet again…trust me guys, I felt like saying, this isn't easy for me either!!!

I felt like I had JUST gotten comfortable and poof…I was up and running again. I was just picturing this…picture a dog roaming around the house…trying to find comfort…its hot, the dog's tired and just wants REST…he cant find any…but soon finds some kind of comfort in one spot…but then a bug comes and the dog has to get up and move again…roaming almost aimlessly around looking for another spot…

This is how I have felt the last 8 months…

I didn't grieve the loss of Grandpa right away, but instead found peace that he wasn't suffering anymore. I cried more before he died than I did after. It was grueling to watch someone you love so much go through all of that. I have to admit, I felt alone in the process, although I wasn't. I believe that God wanted me to spend those last precious moments with just Grandpa alone though. I remember visiting him in the hospital, especially one Friday night. I remember thinking, "I want to see him no matter what." I went and although he was in a lot of pain and not feeling well at all, I had one of the best times with him that I had had in a long time. It was just him and I…in a hospital room…the funny part is, he wanted to sit in the chair that I was in (cause his back hurt him) therefore I had to switch with him and sit on the bed! LOL. This is healing for me to talk about this….I really haven't reminisced about him and I am tired of burying the pain…in work…in friends…in my own hearts desires…in busying myself with church…etc. I am tired of packing up my own feelings, only to unpack them, then pack them up again…I am tired of moving. I am tired of moving my life…my emotions…I am tired of unpacking them and placing them on a shelf that no one can see…or even out in the open where they become stumbling blocks for others. I don't know what to do with these emotions. I cry, I get anxious, nervous, frustrated and confused. I haven't wanted to deal with them…or haven't before, but do now…so therefore I box them up again…only to keep doing the same pattern as I had been.

I need a way out. I need to vent…I need to cry…release the emotions and put away the boxes for good. I need to be settled. To be loved and cared for…I need to RECEIVE the love that others so graciously give to me. Including our Father. I need to stop focusing on the things of the past that I cannot change. I need to stop feeling like I am a burden to others and allow them to listen to me.

Wow…praise you Lord. Through it all, you have been a constant rock in my life. I am looking forward to the days ahead…to the break in the clouds in my life…I know that with you all things are possible and that you will never leave me…

First Love

I wrote this in early August of this year (2008). I had been going through a really hard time...just alot of rejection and confusion and deep sorrow that I had been suppressing for so long. I experienced a breakthrough a few weeks after I wrote this and was changed and brought to a new place in Christ, but it's always nice to look back on what we write and learn that even in the most difficult times, Jesus is still speaking to us and encouraging us to press in.

First Love

"I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love." Revelation 2:2-4

As the Lord has been bringing up past hurts and offenses that have been buried deep in my heart lately, I was reminded of the scripture above. As I read it again, I thought, "wow…imagine doing all of those things, only to have God say to you, I have this against you.." That's how much of a jealous God he is. And rightfully so. He pours out his love into us constantly…it is fathomless, uncontainable, unrelenting, etc. Why shouldn't we love HIM like he loves us? Why shouldn't we spend as much time with him as we can, he waits and longs for us…I'm preaching to myself here.

One of the deep hurts that God has been working on with me, is that of my first love. I am sure most people have dealt with the bitter sting of a first love. It hurts..there are no words for it. It cuts deeper than any knife and the wound can last forever. Honestly, the wound from my first "love" wasn't the worst one in my case…but the most recent. Since I am writing about the first love though, let me elaborate more on that.

I dated RJ for 3 years, when I was 17-20 yrs old. We had a pretty "solid" relationship and spent almost every waking hour together for those three years. We were best friends, not only lovers. Our families even knew each other over time and that made it all the more sweet….or bitter at the end.

RJ and I shared some intimate first times together (not sex) but other things. At the time, I thought I was going to marry him. I remember getting out of my classes (I was only in highschool) and thinking about what we would do as we hung out that evening. We ate at each other's houses, we talked on the phone all night, we played video games together, went out with our friends, went camping, played sports, etc. You name it, we did it, pretty much. I had NEVER before experienced these emotions that I had felt with him. I wanted to be with him forever. I loved him. I shared many of my most secret thoughts with him. Then one day, it all changed. I had found out that he was lying to me about some things..working late, smoking, hanging out with girls when he wasn't with me..etc. We grew apart over time and eventually I found out the last straw one night and broke up with him. I believe he had cheated on me, but I will never be certain.

I said all of this to say….that God is jealous of our time. He is jealous of what we set our affections on. Are our affections set on him? More so than anyone else? The bible says that before the foundations of the world were set it, Jesus loved us. Therefore, God is our first love. We are the APPLE of his EYE…one look from our eyes and heart and it makes his heart beat fast. He is our beloved and we are his.

Is Jesus looking at you through the lattice today? If so, let him inside your heart. He longs to go where no man has ever gone or will ever go again…he is your lover…he is your creator..he knows you like no man or woman ever will or could. He knit you together in your mother's womb and before you were born, he knew you. He chose you. Think about how a guy see's a girl that he likes…he approaches her and if the girl reciprocates than they start dating and he has actually chosen her. God is like this. He chooses us, before we choose him..therefore we are HIS.

Go back to the days where you and God would meet for hours….let him romance you…the holy spirit wants to caress you today…he wants you to set your face like flint on him and allow him to sweep you off your feet. He is our prince of peace…let him take you away to his Kingdom. I was watching Cinderella the other day and I fell in love all over again with just the romance of it all…the prince stopping at NOTHING to find her again. He lost her, but found her again and their romance was so fragrant and sweet. Allow Jesus to come find you today…wherever you are. Even if you are dressed in your soot and ashes again…hair a mess….he loves you…and always will.

Phil 4:5-7

My friend Angela wrote a blog this weekend and I was so touched by it that I have to share part of it in here. I only copied certain parts, but the message is loud and clear.

Philippians 4:5-7
5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I realized my own anxiousness... I realized my own inability to put aside the desires of my heart in the pursuit of peace.. I've realized that my requests have gotten lost in confusion, and I have forgotten how to present those same requests to Him, trusting, and leaving... knowing that at that point.. His peace will guard my heart and mind.

I think it is so easy to present a request and then focus solely on that request. How often do we feel something so strongly in our heart.. have such a desire.. and present it to God yet still focus on the request.

Maybe you are being obedient with your tithe, and each time you place another $20 in the plate, you present your request.. focusing SOLELY on the request..

Maybe you have given away some of your favorite items, presenting your request for replacement... focusing SOLELY on the request...

Maybe you have had the desire to meet that "special someone" to come into your life and join together to start a family.... and when you present your request... you focus SOLELY on the request..

Whatever it may be for you personally, we are missing the second part of that verse.. when you present your requests to God, "...the peace of God which transcends all understanding....."

The Second Adam

The bible refers to the second Adam as Jesus Christ. Check out 1 Corinthians 15 for the scriptures pertaining this. I think it is so awesome...Christ overcame the fall of man by dying for our sins and being resurrected from the dead. He came so that we would have LIFE and have it more abundantly. Can someone get excited today!?

1 Cor 15:45 So it is written: "The first man Adam became a living being"^[e]; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit. 46The spiritual did not come first, but the natural, and after that the spiritual. 47The first man was of the dust of the earth, the second man from heaven. 48As was the earthly man, so are those who are of the earth; and as is the man from heaven, so also are those who are of heaven. 49And just as we have borne the likeness of the earthly man, so shall we^[f] bear the likeness of the man from heaven.

50I declare to you, brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. 51Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— 52in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. 53For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. 54When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory."^[g]
55"Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?"^[h] 56The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

58Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Dear God,

A song that I wrote 10/23/08

Verse 1

Dear God,

How can you love me for who I am when the world has rejected me?

How can you hold me in your arms when people just push me away?

God, how can you care about even my tiniest problems when the world is so big?

Dear God,

How can you think of me so much when my family hardly calls?

How can you know the pain I deal with when all I do is hide?

God, how do you know my hearts desires when I don’t tell a single soul?

Chorus:

But Somehow you do…somehow you know…somehow you feel the pain that I have,

Somehow you hold me and love me, no matter what I go through or do…

And God, I just want to say thank you…this letter is for you.

Verse 2

Dear God

How can you show love to someone who doesn’t feel they deserve it?

How is it that you have my very hairs numbered on my head, yet no one knows my name?

God, why would you want to protect me, when I just keep living in fear?

Dear God,

How is it you bring me such joy when I don’t even try to attain it?

How do you wait patiently for me even though I don’t always wait for you?

God, why would you die for me when I sometimes don’t even want to live?

Chorus

Bridge: (powerful and loud)

OH GOD…you are amazing, you are so awesome..

You love me so much…thank you my Lord…

You fill my cup, you are so worthy!

You are so worthy!

I don’t understand how you know me so well…

Chorus

Verse 3 (softly)

Dear God, I thank you for all of these things, teach me what your love means.

Love,

Me

Whatever You're Doing

I think we can all relate to this song somehow. I know for me, it was one of those songs that defined a season of my life and that season was most of this year. God revealed some deep things to me during some of the darkest times of my life over the last year and he gets all the Glory for getting me through it all. I could not have done it without him, and now that I look back, I see that he was indeed doing SOMETHING HEAVENLY. Praise you, Jesus! The song is called, "Whatever You're Doing" by Sanctus Real.

It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
All I can do is surrender

[Chorus]
Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something heavenly

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Revaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow your will
or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is you want from me
I give everything I surrender...
To...
[Chorus]
Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly
Something heavenly

It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time breathe in and let everything out

1 Cor 13 kind of love

I Found this information on a website when I looked up sermons on love. I felt the tug on my heart to write about love and what it really means in God's eyes. Let us love like he loves. All of the below are words from a man who wrote this sermon...none of them are mine, although I strongly agree with what he has to say.

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding going or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. IF I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” 1 Cor 13

We can speak with the tongue of men and angels. We can have the gift of prophecy. We can fathom all kinds of mysteries. We can have faith that moves mountains. We can give all that we have to the poor and we can even give our lives in sacrifice and if we do not have love, it means nothing. So the first thing we learn about love is that it is essential. It's not an option for a successful life. When it comes to relationships, anything minus love equals nothing. Zero. Love is essential.

I think about a time that I was helping a person who was disabled and in a wheelchair, and I helped this person get up and down stairs and curbs and things like that, and when it was all over the person didn't thank me and it bothered me. I started to get angry inside. Here I was being Johnny Do-Gooder and they don't even thank me and I found out later that this person doesn't thank anyone for help because he feels like most of the barriers that are in his way as a disabled person are because society has not accommodated their needs. So he never says thank you as a issue of principle. Now whether that's loving or not, I am not going to worry about. What I am worried about is my response, because I got angry. We always have this sort of mixed experience even when we are doing something good and something bad is right there. Love is not easily angered. It always protects. It always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres. In other words, love expects God to work and love is constantly hoping for change in people and love doesn't give up after one good try. It's going to try again and it's going to try again and it's going to try again. This is real love.

God loves us like this. God is patient with us. God is kind to us. He is not easily angered with us. These things are true. If we put Jesus' name instead of love in this passage, Jesus is patient, Jesus is kind, Jesus doesn't envy, we see a picture of the kind of life that Jesus lived and so we have this assurance that this is the way God loves us. So that means that God accepts us right now as we are, but God loves us enough to not leave us there. He wants us to change.

God loved us so much that while we were still enemies Christ died for us. He gave his only begotten son, that whoever would take advantage of this and believe in him won't have to perish but can have an eternal relationship and purposeful life with him. We celebrate at this table love. We celebrate the vertical relationship we have with God. God loves us this much. This is how secure we are. Jesus died for us before we were his friends. Now that we have responded in some kind of way, how much more can we expect from the love of God? And it's also a time to celebrate our relationships with one another, because we are all going to take a piece of this and we are going to dip and that means that we are all part of one family. One family whom God loves this much and he then is saying love one another as I have loved you.

Let's pray. Gracious God, we thank you for these gifts of this table and for the big gift that stands behind it. Jesus Christ. Lord, who gave himself for us and that in Him we now have a relationship with you that can deepen and go on forever. We thank you that you accept us, that you accept us the way these words in 1st Corinthians tell us. This deeply, but we thank you too that you are out to work in our lives, to make us like you. And so we pray that you will do this work in us even as we use the words that you taught us, Our Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: for Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

Sin Robs...

The bible says that God is love.

If the exact expression of God is indeed love itself than that leads me to believe, although NOT stated in the bible as far as I know, that the devil is sin.

I know it may sound a little far fetched to some of you, but think about it...God can only give what he is...which are GOOD things...the devil can only give what is bad. Maybe a better word for him would be evil rather than sin. However, I was prompted to write on sin and what it does.

This morning I was thinking, as I still lay in bed, about how much sin really destroys us. The bible says that the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy. Think about that...he comes to take away the things that we love...he comes to kill the desires that God has set in our hearts and he comes to destroy those things that God has given us...such as marriages, jobs, children, ministries, etc. And guess whose fault it is when he is able to do these things?!?
Not pointing fingers or placing blame...but we can't be complacent and let him take these things any LONGER! Since sin is so present in the world and will be until the second coming of Jesus Christ, than we need to (as children of God) take up our swords and fight! We should never let the thief come in...we should never open the door to him and welcome him in.

Picture this: We know a thief is on the loose and we are home...alone. We hear knocking on the door...we ignore for a time being...we choose to lay down on our couch or just pretend like it is the wind...we do NOTHING to protect ourselves or our homes...we are so lazy that we don't feel like locking the door, although we know what could come into our homes. We SLEEP with the door unlocked...the door to our hearts...the door to our souls. We lie dormant! Until eventually...the thief is able to break in...and sometimes too easily...sometimes we might as well leave the door wide open to the thief "sin".

People..we need to RISE UP and stop letting sin take control. The bible says that "He is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins if we confess them"...and YES, our God is SO FAITHFUL...he forgives us, he is merciful beyond comprehension and altogether lovely....
but we need to be careful because as much as he forgives us...and loves us...sin STILL steals our blessings and destroys our lives. Just because he forgives us doesn't make things all better...we need to do some work in order for our lives to be purified.

What is it today that is holding you back from the fullness thereof??? Is it lying, cheating, stealing?? It is lust, envy, drunkeness? Or is it a cold, hardened heart towards God and his people? Ask yourself...be honest with yourself and with God...he knows your heart and thoughts anyway. The bible says that the word of God is a double edged sword and knows the intents and thoughts of the heart!!

Repent. Repent does not mean to ask God to forgive you over and over again....it means to literally TURN AWAY from your sins...to reject evil...to cleave to what is good...to turn towards God...never to return to your sins.

God loves you and longs to give you the desires of your heart...are you ready to give him the things that keep you from them?

Meeting

So, I just had a meeting with my boss...

It went really good and funny thing is...the ONLY thing that she told me that I could improve on...WASN'T being on the internet or talking on the phone, it wasn't even being late a few times or getting something into her after she asked (which btw doesn't happen) but the thing that she asked me to improve on was talking about GOD!!!!!! She mentioned that some people I work with have expressed concern that I speak so freely about Jesus. WOW...how sad.

I must be doing something good then!!! Look what God has to say about those that are persecuted for righteousness....

"BLESSED are those that are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the KINGDOM OF HEAVEN" Matthew 5:10

I will take persecution to receive the Kingdom of heaven any day.... : )

To oblige my boss though and my co-workers I will be obedient...

Greater is my reward in heaven!!

Let your light shine...but not too brightly

We have all heard it said, “Let your light so shine before men” and I am writing today to say that we absolutely need to let our light shine, but I was surprised at the revelation that I had while driving into work this morning.

The sun was bright…so bright that I could barely see a thing as I drove down Western Ave, towards Suny. Even my visor wasn’t doing much to block out the light that was penetrating my eyes. I was thinking of how beautiful and POWERFUL the sun really is. I believe that God showed me something through this moment…

How often do we witness to someone? And if we are bold enough to reach out and preach the Gospel, as God commands us to do, do you sometimes feel like it is overkill? I have been hesitant to write this blog, I have actually had it saved in my drafts for a few days, because I wanted to wait on the Lord and see if this is what he was really showing me.

I feel like sometimes we can say too much or be too overpowering to unbelievers. I have even heard it said that sometimes Christians can act Kooky. Sometimes we can start speaking “Christianese” and totally lose our once captive audience. I know personally, I have said some things in the past that I never realized could have been taken way out of context or have been received the wrong way.

Here are a few funny examples that a guest preacher actually shared at my church this year.
Never say to unbeliever:

“I am covered with the blood of Christ”

“Devil, I rebuke you in Jesus’ name”

“I’m drunk on the holy ghost”

And never start just speaking in tongues!!!

Now most of these are obvious and definitely could be frowned upon by unbelievers..leaving them to think we have ultimately gone mad. LOL

But God was showing me more than this…he was saying that YES he wants us to share the good news with others and encourage them to follow him, etc…but have you ever heard it said, “preach the gospel, use words when necessary?” I love that!! That is saying that your LIFE should be the light that others see and admire….they should see Christ in YOU…not just talking about him….but SHOWING him to the world by the way that you live.

I was thinking at how profound that revelation really is….just the way the sun was so bright that it hurt my eyes….sometimes our lights can be too powerful and overbearing and may actually HINDER people from coming to Christ.

We should never force anything on others...God gave them a choice…his will or free will and they will have to make their own decisions. After all, they will be standing in front of him on judgment day and they will have to answer for themselves…until then, let’s pray that our lights are just bright enough for them to see the truth and not overpowering in that we blind them.

Psalm 27

This is one of my favorite Psalms....I actually wrote it on my Grandfather's memorial poster at his wake. I witnessed him go through more suffering than anyone I had known in his last months with us...and I believe that the Lord really strengthened me during that time, so that I could be strong for him. This Psalm is a dedication to those that feel weak...or inadequate....know that he is God and he is where you should draw your strength from.

Psalm 27

A Psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the strength of my life;
Of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When the wicked came against me
To eat up my flesh,
My enemies and foes,
They stumbled and fell.
3 Though an army may encamp against me,
My heart shall not fear;
Though war may rise against me,
In this I will be confident.

4 One thing I have desired of the LORD,
That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
All the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD,
And to inquire in His temple.
5 For in the time of trouble
He shall hide me in His pavilion;
In the secret place of His tabernacle
He shall hide me;
He shall set me high upon a rock.

6 And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me;
Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy in His tabernacle;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the LORD.

7 Hear, O LORD, when I cry with my voice!
Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.
8 When You said, “Seek My face,”
My heart said to You, “Your face, LORD, I will seek.”
9 Do not hide Your face from me;
Do not turn Your servant away in anger;
You have been my help;
Do not leave me nor forsake me,
O God of my salvation.
10 When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the LORD will take care of me.

11 Teach me Your way, O LORD,
And lead me in a smooth path, because of my enemies.
12 Do not deliver me to the will of my adversaries;
For false witnesses have risen against me,
And such as breathe out violence.
13 I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the LORD
In the land of the living.

14 Wait on the LORD;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the LORD!

Accepted and Protected!!

I have been standing on these words of wisdom lately, that were shared to me by a dear friend of mine…Sara C. : ) Thank you, Sara. I asked her if I could write a blog on it and she encouraged me to!!

Accepted and Protected….not REJECTED.

We have all heard it said that God accepts us as we are…he died while we were YET sinners. He died for even the men that were drilling huge spikes into his hands and feet. He died for us to be FREE and live a life pleasing to him…a life that is full and healthy…a joyful life that is uplifting to others and encouraging…a life free of addictions and fear…an ABUNDANT life. This is the kind of life that God intended us to live as he created Adam and Eve. It is the kind of life that he had in mind before the foundation of time.

How many of you know that God is a God of LOVE? He corrects us because he LOVES us. Think about an earthly father that tells his son or daughter that she can't go out past ten o'clock…even though her whole group of friends gets to stay out till midnight. The girl could become bitter, angry..even resentful towards her father for making her "miss out." What her earthly Father is actually doing is PROTECTING her. God's love is unfathomable. It is out of our human understanding. It is so much deeper than we could ever possibly think of or imagine. There is no greater love than this: that a man would lay his life down for his friends. WOW. Jesus did this over 2,000 yrs ago…for you and for me.

I was telling Sara that I felt so rejected by just different things in life…people, jobs, situations, etc. Of course, even Jesus was rejected, so it is certain that we too would feel this. Especially for the ones who truly live for and love, God. Sara told me something so profound…she said, "Deb, you are not rejected…you are protected." I said, "you mean accepted?" And she went on to say that God accepts us, yes…but she said that God was telling her that the opposite of rejection is protection. I didn't really get it..always knowing that the opposite of rejection was acceptation. So Sara elaborated. She said that God keeps us from those things that he knows would harm us or cause us to go off track from him.

How many times have you felt rejected? Don't count…I'm sure it would be too many. BUT the Almighty says, "my child, I was not allowing you to do that for your own good." God is soo awesome!! I praise him for ALL the times that I was rejected, because it only meant that he had something BETTER up his sleeve for me…and chances were that he always gave whatever he had to me quickly after the disappointment too. If I had just waited on him a little longer, instead of giving into the flesh…I would have received his best all along. We are human though and therefore, since sin is still present in the world, we fall short. WE ALL DO.

Remember the time that Mom said no to something you REALLY wanted to do?? What about the time that Your Father wouldn't let you go somewhere with a friend? And Grandpa stopped you from being something that you thought you wanted to be? There are SOO many things that I look back on now and I say "wow..thank you Lord….thank you for being a constant in my life…even when I didn't know you like I do now…you still looked out for me." THAT's how much he loves us. Even when we can't see him or feel him or know he is watching…..HE IS!!!

So, next time you feel rejected…look up and smile and thank God, cause it only means that you are PROTECTED and ACCEPTED by him…

My Walk

While walking my dog the other day, God gave me a revelation. Cookie and I decided to go see my aunt, who lives maybe roughly a mile, or a little over, from me. I thought that it wouldn't be too bad of a walk, especially since it was so nice out. On the way there, I realized that it was further than I had expected to walk, but there was no turning back now, I had set on a journey and I wasn't turning back. I figured when we got there, we could visit and rest a little, before heading home……well….my aunt wasn't home and neither was anyone else, so Cookie and I rested for a few minutes and started our journey back home. I didn't realize how tired I would be after walking a mile there, but my legs were a little sore and I was sweating….Cookie was also started to lag a bit and her tongue was hanging out in desperation for some water. I felt so bad that I was so unprepared for the trip that I took her on….she is too heavy to carry, so I just kept encouraging her to keep up with me. I, being her care giver and owner, had such compassion on her as I couldn't imagine being black with fur in that heat. It literally felt 10 degrees hotter than when we left my house at that point and the sun was beating down on us. We continued walking up hills, around bends and turns….Cookie was pulling and tugging me in every direction, to sniff EVERY fire hydrant, every bush, flower, etc…and then I had my revelation…thank you God. We approached a patch of lush, green grass and Cookie immediately wanted to roll in it…at first I didn't want her to…seeing that I had to be home and leave for the JC Club in 20 minutes, but I relented and she was so appreciative. She rolled around in the cool grass and she layed there for a few minutes…just panting, catching her breath. I smiled, at the comfort that it brought her. God quickly brought to mind, "He makes me lie down in green pastures" Psalm 23. I smiled even bigger…knowing that God was showing me how much he has compassion on me, with my walk with him. How he watches me grow tired and try to pull and tug in different directions….how I am so thirsty and he longs to give me a drink….how he see's the journey ahead of me, even though I can't…and he encourages me to keep up….

How he desires to give me rest and allows me….MAKES me….lie down in green pastures…he leads me beside still waters….Cookie and I actually walked by some stagnant water AFTER her lying down in the grass…he is so gracious to me. He loves me unconditionally….

When Cookie and I got home, I gave her a cold, fresh bowl of water and a treat……just like when God brings me home from my walk with him, he will reward me….

Thank you Jesus.

That Day on Calvary

A song I wrote:

Verse 1

I think back to that day…

As I wipe the tears away…

I can’t do anything but thank him…

Chorus:

For that day on Calvary…

The day Christ set me free…

His love for me is so amazing…

He was nailed to the cross for my shame…

He gave me everything…

When he hung on the cross for me.

Verse 2

How many of you can thank him today?

Do you know he washed our sins away…

I can’t do anything but thank him…

Chorus

BRIDGE:

And I can’t even begin to think…

Of how much pain I brought him…

But his love for me was greater…

He died for my sins and shames, my diseases and my pains

And now I will always thank him for…

Chorus (Very quiet and slow)

Lead me to you

Here's a song that I wrote that I really would love to put music to

Lead me to you

Verse 1

If yesterday is gone, than why am I sitting here

struggling to belong…

The chains of the past, trying to remain

wrapped around me..

When all I want is your freedom…

I am tired of the lies…

Chorus:

So, here I am today…

Repenting for yesterday…

Lord help me to see that you are here…

Help me to see the truth behind the lies…

Help me to see with Jesus’ eyes…

Oh God, help me to find….the peace that

I once knew…………lead me to you…

Verse 2

Manipulation and defeat…

It used to cover me…

But now I sit here in your presence…

Lord, help me to feel again…

To feel your closeness…

As I draw near to you…

Chorus

Starving for Intimacy

Starving for Intimacy

So, the past few years I have been enjoying getting people together (and still do) and uniting fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Fellowship is VERY important to every person…God created Eve for Adam, because “it wasn’t good for man to be alone.” We all need each other…we need encouragement, wisdom from others and company at times. Sometimes we just need people to listen to us and not say a single word. Other times we need others to correct us in love “rebuke a brother in love.” I know for myself, there have been many times where I wouldn’t ask someone for advice, but something deep inside of me was longing for a word in season or some good advice. I don’t always allow everyone to speak into my situations and that’s actually using Godly wisdom…but I’ve learned that not everyone is going to say what I want to hear and that’s a good thing! “God works all things together for good for those that love him and are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28. I also appreciate the times where people can relate to me and really speak into my life with compassion and love. It’s those times that I am really ministered to and can actually receive love. See, God has shown me that in the past I have avoided TRUE intimacy….

What is true intimacy? It is giving and receiving. It is NOT one sided…it is not giving everything until you are left feeling empty, it is not constantly receiving either…being selfish. It is ALLOWING others to pour into you while allowing yourself to pour into them. Worship is a lot like this. We are not only giving to God…but he wants to minister to us as well…and pour into us. Being in a relationship is the same way…just as we are called to be in a relationship with our creator and lover of our souls, so are we supposed to have intimate relationships with others.

I was recently shown some things that made me step back and re-evaluate my priorities. God is so faithful to not leave you in a certain situation if it isn’t healthy or what he has called you for. Priorities should be like this: God, family, friends. We should always put God first…in ALL things, even the small things. He loves to be included in our lives and WOW..what an honor it is for us that the master of the universe WANTS to be so involved in our lives, even the intricate details of everything. That speaks so much to me! Wow.

God has recently been hiding me under his wings…a season of really sitting at his feet. Of course I feel like it is just the beginning though, as I have felt his feathers (wings) nudging me closer to him, like an eagle. I feel like I am allowing him to move me closer and eventually I will be so immersed in his wings that I will know him like never before. This isn’t always a painless experience though. Sometimes we have to feel alone in order for him to tell you, “I am all you need.” Sometimes we need to feel rejected in order to realize that it is he who accepts us. Sometimes we need to just rest and stop striving for his love, when it has been given to us all along. We need to “Be still and Know he is God.” We need to REST in his presence…acknowledge him…ALLOW him.

I’ve noticed that in the past I have been so involved in others lives, that it seems as if my own has vanished. I can’t do that anymore…I need to be filled, just as much as I pour out. It goes hand in hand.

God has shown me how I have been quick to run when the intimate times come up….one on one with someone?? HA..what was that in the last year? I realized that even with God I tend to be shy away from intense quiet times etc. It wasn’t until I actually became EXHAUSTED and frustrated within the last few months that I realized that I need to just SIT at his feet…that I need to sit with friends….that I need to just sit and ponder things sometimes. It’s so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. I can’t tell you how many people that I have lost touch with, even family, due to being so busy. It’s sad actually. We should never be too busy for those that we love. It happens…but we shouldn’t let it continue.

I thank God for showing me these things and for bringing about a change in my life….I desire…no I am starving for intimacy…I want so much to just be with people I love…especially in the presence of my Father in Heaven. Let that be our hearts cry….to have relationships….ones where people can trust us and we can trust them…